Wilds of Eldraine (WOE) Limited Set Review: Red

Hey everyone! I hope you’re ready to get wild in the crazy world of Eldraine. Things have changed since the last time we visited with a serious lack of Elk related humor. Instead, we are focusing on WotC’s strange takes on classic fairy tales. That means that it is filled with puns and dad jokes galore so it’s clearly designed to go along with my writing style.

On top of that I get to pronounce WOE exactly like Joey Lawerence every time. Granted most of you are thinking “What is this old man blathering about, someone get him his meds.” I can assure you it was a thing back in the day with Avatar of Woe.

Per usual, I’ll be grading the entire set for the purpose of limited as well as writing about a million other articles about it until they let me out of the content creation dungeon. With all that, you’ll be well prepared to crush some dreams.

For those of you wondering if I missed some cards, the adventures that require different colors for each part are in the multicolor section. The Enchanting Tales bonus sheet will have its own article as well.

Here’s the usual grading scale:

• 5.0: Disgustingly powerful and basically unbeatable. Either answer it the turn it comes down or just pack up your cards. (Tovolar's Huntmaster, The Meathook Massacre, Starnheim Unleashed)
• 4.5: Incredible bomb that still gives your opponent a slim chance. (Adeline, Resplendent Cathar, Alrund's Epiphany, Grand Master of Flowers)
• 4.0: Great rare or the absolute best uncommons and removal. (Froghemoth, Morbid Opportunist, Skullport Merchant)
• 3.5: Great role filler or removal that you never cut. (Magic Missile, Cathartic Pyre, Battle Cry Goblin)
• 3.0: Good playable that I’m basically never cutting. (Usher of the Fallen, Search Party Captain, Dragon Turtle)
• 2.5: Decent playable and the bar I hope nearly every card in my deck to reach. (Mourning Patrol, Steadfast Paladin, Goblin Morningstar)
• 2.0: Mediocre filler that normally is your 20-23rd card(s). (Contact Other Plane, Mindleech Ghoul, Timberland Guide)
• 1.5: Replaceable, overall bad filler. Could also be decent sideboard cards. (Secrets of the Key, Spiked Pit Trap, Village Rites)
• 1.0: Bad filler. Gets cut most of the time. (Secret Door, Mystic Skull, Funeral Longboat)
• 0.5: Very unhappy to main deck this, but maybe it has fringe sideboard applications. (You See a Guard Approach, Bramble Armor, Compelled Duel)
• 0.0: Unplayable in every possible situation. (Mimic, Change of Fortune, Curse of Shaken Faith)

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Belligerent of the Ball

Rating: 2.5/5

Another wonderful pun to start today’s review off with. They doubled down on the Belle of the Brawl joke from ELD, but I’m certainly not complaining.

This should be pretty easy to trigger between roles and all the rats running around. Even with the requirement to celebrate, menace is a nice bonus to the usual three drop that gives +1+0 card.

Bellowing Bruiser

Rating: 1.5/5

The adventure can potentially steal you a game, but it’s more of a “Oh that happens to be good here” then something with legitimate value. I guess if you top deck this with eight mana you can beat a path before smashing in, but I don’t see the adventure being cast that often.

That leaves you with mostly a 4/4 haste for five with slight upside. That’s a card twenty-three if you don’t have any other top end.

Bespoke Battlegarb

Rating: 1.5/5

This counts itself for celebration so you only need to cast one other permanent to equip this for free. Still the only way I want to play this is if I have a bunch of rats ready to be geared up that I can keep smashing in with.

Boundary Lands Ranger

Rating: 2.0/5

Welcome to another episode of “Bears with upside”. Being able to rummage for free every turn is a nice skill in the later game as long you have a decent amount of ways to trigger it.

Charming Scoundrel

Rating: 2.5/5

This scoundrel charmed me into this grade through its versatility.  Unlikely to ever be spectacular, but good in many different situations.

Cut In

Rating: 3.0/5

The Young Hero Role is interesting because it can be the MVR (Most Valuable Role) when it’s on a small creature and you’re the beatdown. It can also be pretty worthless if you are on defense or only have big creatures.

Now that I finished that little Cut In, even at sorcery speed this is fine because it kills over 90% of the creatures in the set. You even get that Role thrown in so a low to the ground aggressive red deck is going to like (not quite love) this.

Edgewall Pack

Rating: 3.0/5

I am way too entertained by this rat riding around on a pack of dogs.

Not quite Chimney Rabble, but even a wish.com facsimile is still pretty good. Obviously not being able to use the rat as a chump blocker is a pretty big downside, but we’re all aggro bay bay!

Embereth Veteran

Rating: 2.5/5

You’ve heard about Bear with upside, how about Savannah Lions with upside? You’ve heard of that one too? In this set even? Oh well, being able to turn this into another game piece after it’s outlived its usefulness is pretty decent. Being able to do it at instant speed is even better.

Flick a Coin

Rating: 2.5/5

I probably love this card more that I should, but it really speaks to me. Drawing a card while potentially killing a creature and getting a treasure is a fantastic deal for only three mana.

There’s also the old Zap someone when they are at one play. That’s such a sweet feeling victory.  

Food Fight

Rating: 2.0/5

This is a build around that really wants a continuous way to make artifacts to make it worth it. You have to have at least five ways to make an artifact before even considering putting it in your deck. The first activation leaving you four mana (and another game piece) into a Shock is pretty subpar, but there will be decks that this is really good in.

Frantic Firebolt

Rating: 3.0/5

I would be franticly trying to draft this if it could go face… Unfortunately, it’s “just” a scalable instant speed removal spell.  Perhaps a certain rare will pop up later to enable this.

Gnawing Crescendo

Rating: 1.5/5

Not every deck is going to want this, but the go wide decks will happily run one of these as a finisher.

Goddric, Cloaked Reveler

Rating: 3.5/5

RAWR! Goddric is ready to party beatdown style. Since he counts himself, it’s not too difficult to trigger celebration mode with one other permanent that turn. A great follow up to this is dropping Edgewall Pack because who doesn’t want to celebrate a pack of dogs showing up.

Grabby Giant

Rating: 1.5/5

At least Captain Grabby Pants can ramp to himself. If you’re short on twos then making a treasure is at least something to do. The creature itself can be decent if you’re weak to flyers or sitting in a late game stalemate.  

Grand Ball Guest

Rating: 2.0/5

There appears to be a hidden theme of “Bear with upside”. As long as you can keep the celebration going than this grand ball guest is down to get rowdy after having a couple too many drinks.

Harried Spearguard

Rating: 1.5/5

Your mileage is going to vary with this depending on how deep you’re going into a sacrifice or rat theme. A Raging Goblin that turns into a rat when it dies is still technically a two for one even if it is underwhelming.

Hearth Elemental

Rating: 2.5/5

I wonder how many times someone is going to not read this and just slam the adventure on turn two. I can’t imagine it will happen to anyone more than once. Later in the game, you get two extra cards and a discounted chonker. Not a bad deal as long as you’re willing to wait for it.

Imodane, the Pyrohammer

Rating: 2.5/5

Now this is a card that makes me want to draft Frantic Firebolt so I can send crazy amounts of damage right upside the face. In most cases it’s going to be a 4/4 for four that deals a few extra damage to the opponent. Sometimes it’s going to let you burn them out pretty quickly.

Witchstalker Frenzy turning into a discount Lava Axe or Stonesplitter Bolt turning into a double strength Fireball while still killing creatures is pretty disgusting (or awesome depending on which side of the table you are on).

Kindled Heroism

Rating: 1.0/5

This trick must have some pretty incriminating photos of Wizards R & D because we keep getting some version of it despite it never being good. I do think it might be slightly more playable here than in its doppelgangers many appearances, but overall still a bad card.

Korvold and the Noble Thief

Rating: 1.0/5

Hold up, let me get this straight…I pay four mana and eventually get three cards, but out of my opponent’s deck. That hopefully I have the right color mana to cast those cards based off of the treasure tokens that I got from the first two steps. I also only have one turn to do so after waiting a couple turns to get there.

Typically cards out of your opponents deck will be worse than out of yours because they aren’t built for the same plan. Don’t freak out about the time someone hits your bomb with it because there are plenty of times it hits lands.

Similar to most modern Magic cards this can still have some situations where it is good. Most of the time it is going to be stinking up the joint.

Merry Bards

Rating: 1.5/5

I’ve already discussed how the Young Hero Role makes me feel. This is fine in an aggressive deck that also has other creatures worth putting it on.

Minecart Daredevil

Rating: 2.5/5

Apparently Rimrock Knight has a cousin who is a revolutionary in the sport of Goat Carting. You’re getting a little bit more here for a little more mana which puts it a bit below that card, but still a trick that turns into a high-power creature for a reasonable cost.

Monstrous Rage

Rating: 2.0/5

Functionally this gives +3+1 and trample for only one mana with the +1+1 and trample sticking around if it survives. Being an uncommon means its far less likely that they play around this so you can watch them rage after they get wrecked.

Raging Battle Mouse

Rating: 2.5/5

Great for enabling double spelling while also benefiting from it. That one toughness is rough though and if you draw it late, it’s much harder to trigger.

Ratcatcher Trainee

Rating: 2.5/5

As I just said, one toughness is not where you want to be, but this at least has first strike on your turn. Having the option to get two rats out of this first is the real reason I’m up on it.

Realm-Scorcher Hellkite

Rating: 4.5/5

Giant flying haster (It auto corrected me to hater which would also be an accurate description) that functionally throws in two pings if you Bargain it. That could also enable a splash or let you play some other creature. Most importantly this is going to take over the game if they don’t deal with it ASAP.

I’m sure some of you have had the pleasure of playing against the likes of Shivan Hellkite or Skarrgan Hellkite. For those of you who haven’t, it’s pretty demoralizing sitting there while they just pick off your side and smash your face in.  

Redcap Gutter-Dweller

Rating: 4.0/5

5/5 worth of stats for four mana! Is that Juzam Djinn‘s music?

Bad references aside, this gives you a bunch of game pieces while growing into a larger menacing threat and providing card advantage.  Even if they kill it right away, you still have a couple rats to remember them by.

Redcap Thief

Rating: 2.0/5

Sailor of Means sure does look different from last time I saw them. Maybe they’ve been working out because they’re a little stronger and lost some of that extra butt.

I’m sure you can find something to do with that treasure whether it’s ramping or fixing.

Rotisserie Elemental

Rating: 2.0/5

I get that this is trying to be a Bomat Courier, but I don’t think it quite lives up to that. Having to deal damage to trigger it is a large ask.

Even if you play it turn one and it gets in there a couple turns, you don’t really want to pop it too early because you have to play the cards right away. If you draw it later then it is pretty close to a dead card.  

The only real saving grace is that if you’re playing against a rat deck you have a much better chance of sneaking this in a few times.

Skewer Slinger

Rating: 1.5/5

This looks like they are trying to cosplay as Wolverine with those skewers. SNIKT!

This is oddly more of a defensive creature in a color that wants to be turning creatures sideways. Sure, it’s difficult to block early, but it’s only getting in there for one damage. I would board it in against a deck with a lot of flyers though.

Song of Totentanz

Rating: 3.5/5

I hope your not too skittish about rats, because it’s about to be Rat Fest 2023 up in here.

Giving them (and anything else that entered the battlefield that turn) haste lets you surprise blitz them out. Even if they survive the swarm, they are still there to swing away the next turn.

It’s just not very good if you’re the one getting beatdown while they have a high life total.  

Stonesplitter Bolt

Rating: 3.0/5

This is fine removal, but unless you bargain you’re probably paying more than what you’re killing cost to pay. Basically, you’ll play it, but it’s not something that you’ll be pointing out when someone asks you what’s in your deck.

Tattered Ratter

Rating: 2.5/5

If you’re in the rat deck, this can be amazing. If you’re not, it’s only making the cut if you’re desperate for a two drop.

Torch the Tower

Rating: 3.5/5

This is going to be in competition with Candy Grapple for the best common. Cheap removal that can scale up without costing more mana is amazing in a format with so many high power, low toughness creatures.

Twisted Fealty

Rating: 1.5/5

If Bargain let you sacrifice any creature this card would be giving you some AFR flashbacks. I doubt you want to use this on a Rat token just so that you can sac it. That leaves this as a Threaten that also gives one of your creatures a Wicked Role.

You can board this in if your opponent is playing mostly big slow creatures while you’re trying to aggro them out. Outside of that, I’m not very interested.

Two-Headed Hunter

Rating: 3.0/5

I tend to like double strike tricks more than I should because they let me play “find the lethal” in some absurd situations. Realistically they are merely decent and used as a normal combat trick. Getting a creature out of it afterwards is a massive difference and speaking of massive, this big boi is pretty menacing.  

Unruly Catapult

Rating: 2.0/5

This is a solid blocker and the damage can certainly add up over time especially if you have multiples out. There is a huge difference between the two mana for Thermo-Alchemist and three mana for this.  

You can also toss Curiosity on this to have ALL the fun.

Virtue of Courage

Rating: 3.5/5

This grade is assuming that you have ways to deal noncombat damage to the opponent. Otherwise, this is just a two mana Shock. The key card to combo this with is Unruly Catapult which turns into a card advantage machine.

Witch’s Mark

Rating: 2.5/5

Tormenting Voice is having a very bad day when seeing this. I’m always fine running those type of cards because they help mitigate mana flood or get you out of being mana screwed. Historically to get something extra they end up casting three mana (technically Bitter Reunion requires a third mana to get the extra) , but this little banger is tossing one in for free.

Witchstalker Frenzy

Rating: 3.5/5

Your opponent is going to go into a frenzied rant when you’re attacking with a bunch of critters and kill their biggest creature for only one mana. Even the fail case of a four mana, kill almost anything at instant speed is really good.

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Wrap Up

Red has a deep variety of burn spells that have a great range of damage at reasonable costs. Between making rat and treasure tokens, it’s excellent at providing plenty of fodder for Bargain making. It also has some aggressively statted creatures to keep the beats coming.

Thanks for reading! I’ll be back tomorrow with my Limited Mechanics guide and the day after for my limited review of the green cards of Wilds of Eldraine. Until then, stay classy people!

If you have any questions, let me know in the comments below.

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